Boardroom Battle Enthusiast Gifts

"Negotiations are progressing. No one's made a gratuitous personal attack in 12 minutes."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"Hoskins, try saying 'profits are up' without the finger quotes, okay?"

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

"I'm Jackson, your new micro-manager."

"I see we're going up against the Big Guys."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

'Dog eat dog.'

'I'm moving up to be Chairperson-of-the-board. One of you will be President.' (Men have fencing swords).

"We've had a major development this year that I'm excited to share with the employees."

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

"Oh good, you brought Robert's rules of order."

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

"He's not sleeping. He always dims his display while downloading data."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'Well, your guess is as good as mine. Almost.'

Around here it got a little tricky...

'You're closer to the Big Guy than anyone. Will you help us kill him?'

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

'Who wants the talking stick?'

"When everyone's an 800 pound gorilla, nobody's an 800 pound gorilla.".

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

"I'm tired of being used as a scapegoat."

Executive puts on brave face for board meeting.

"Does it ever cross your mind that we make a lot of money because no one else wants to do what we do?"