Boardroom Battle Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Negotiations are progressing. No one's made a gratuitous personal attack in 12 minutes."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"Hoskins, try saying 'profits are up' without the finger quotes, okay?"

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

"Great plan. Could we get some more details?"

"I see we're going up against the Big Guys."

"Oh dear...I don't think negotiations are going too well..."

"I'm Jackson, your new micro-manager."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

"We've had a major development this year that I'm excited to share with the employees."

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

'I'm moving up to be Chairperson-of-the-board. One of you will be President.' (Men have fencing swords).

'Dog eat dog.'

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

"Oh good, you brought Robert's rules of order."

"I will now fend off questions from the audience."

'By the time I climbed up to this job, I was too tired to do it.'

"He's not sleeping. He always dims his display while downloading data."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'You're closer to the Big Guy than anyone. Will you help us kill him?'

'Well, your guess is as good as mine. Almost.'

Around here it got a little tricky...

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

'Who wants the talking stick?'

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

"When everyone's an 800 pound gorilla, nobody's an 800 pound gorilla.".

Executive puts on brave face for board meeting.

"Does it ever cross your mind that we make a lot of money because no one else wants to do what we do?"

"I'm tired of being used as a scapegoat."

Is there a spin doctor in the house?