Blurry Sight Survivor Pillows

"Okay, forget the second line. Can you read the first line?"

Dog leading a blind dog and blind person.

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

Tunnel of lurve

I had my eyes dilated.

Tennis Player Receives Unwanted Advice on the Tennis Court of Public Opinion.

'Cliff! Cliff!.. Where are you Cliff?'

"Everybody freeze! This is a stickup!"

The seeing-eye cat.

'Worst case of premature baldness I've ever seen.'

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

"I've lost my keys, my wallet and my iPhone! Frankly, I think MINE is the lost generation!"

'It just hasn't been my day.'

'Oooh the Timpsons have got new blinds.' (Blinds read 'Sod off you nosy cow).

'Your profile said you were tall, dark, and mysterious.'

"Well, looks like it's time for eyeglasses."

Guide dog reading paper over a man's shoulder.

'Your blind date reminded you of a TV star?, 'Yeah -- I think he was wearing Columbo's raincoat.'

'Well, if a dog's going to beg, that's the way to do it.'

'This day goes from bad to worse.'

'Okay, I admit the photo I sent you wasn't that recent, and I'm not really a male model. But everything else is true!'

Seeing Eye Dog bumps into pole.

'Seeing eye marsupial.'

"Is that it? I don't have my contacts in."

"Our blind dates have spotted us, but it's going to be a while before we reach them: try to stay nonchalant all the way though..."

'Damn it Fifi! I told you not to chase squirrels!' (Blind woman being abducted by aliens).

Human Error, Stupid (computers)

"Your dad sure is a sport! Guess what he slipped me??"

Male pattern damnation

When seeing eye dogs go bad.

'Yes, I know you sent me your photo before we met. But, I just assumed it was out of focus.'

"Of all the hundreds of islands I could get washed up on, I get to land on Hell's Island."

Clancy: Coot of a Day

Message in a bottle breaks on a rock.

'Just looking, thanks.'