Blueprint Connoisseur T-Shirts

'Hi, I'm a blueprint.'

"We only got six days of funding."

"Of all the buildings I've designed, it's probably the most handsome."

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"Here's the parking lot."

Bathroom Fairy

Sundar Pichai's first doodle.

"He's an abstract artist."

'The project is a little behind schedule. It was proactive, now it's retroactive.'

'Frankly, I prefer the monkey's plans.'

Five Ideas For Success: Always finish what you. . .

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

"Milk does a body good but champagne does it better!"

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'I wanted a change in decor.'

File Cabinets for Perfectionists

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

Crane fishing

Man-made vs dog-made

"It's called 'Sold'."

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

"Whether we refer to them as lakes or ponds, it's mere semantics."

"And nobody noticed the crease in the blueprint?"

"No, we're looking for a roofer, not a woofer."

Summertime... When you go zero to 'booked up' in 3.5 seconds

"Who's the artist?"

'It's a good building contract legally, but your jargon's weak.'

'Soufle, can I have the blueprint?.'

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

'Look dear - the first skip of spring...'

'After sinking all our money into our website, we couldn't afford to finish our building.'