Blissful Reflections Gifts

"No, your body is actually alive and well back on earth - your mind has just arrived at the gates of blissful dementia."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

ZZZZZZZ Top

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

The older I get, the more introspective I get, or is that retrospective?'

"You used to be that ambitious."

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

'He hasn't been the same since the Goodyear blimp sneaked up behind him.'

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

'Let's face it George: we're not spring chickens anymore...'

'Is that all you can do Just sitting there watching your old movies'

Getting older is...making noises whenever you bend down or get back up.

"Wasn't I lovely then eh, Tiddles?"

'Don't worry too much about it dear, just say I do and we can get on with the honeymoon.'

"Dear Mom and Dad: Thanks for the happy childhood. You've destroyed any chance I had of becoming a writer."

This is what Fred gets for wishing for more hair.

'Brother, the Lord takes a very dim view of the comb-over.'

Desk at the Horizon

"Remember back when we were just larva and didn't have a care in the world?"

Windchimes

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

"You should do something brilliant, before it's too late."

"My salad days have all turned to coleslaw..."

'It's quite common with men your age. You've got a silver duct tapeworm.'

"I don't feel ready to commit to a cacoon, either, but do you ever worry we'll wake up one day and be forty and still caterpillars?"

'I'm at the age when everything Mother Nature gave Father Time is taking away...'

"It started with a few grey hares in my 20's and they kept showing up."