Blame Game Tactician Gifts

Business cartoon showing a business man headed toward 'blame'.

"This position has become very important to the company."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

"Delegating authority is good. Delegating blame is better."

Alternative fielding positions

"It's not my fault! The Russians must have hacked my brain!"

'So, now we have ascertained who is responsible...'

'Don't blame yourself, Jenkins... let me do that!'

'I'll try blaming it on auto correct and if that doesn't work, I'll blame you.'

The Birth of a Lawsuit

"I'm tired of being used as a scapegoat."

'To address this mistake we must use root-cause analysis. I'll begin by saying it's not my fault.'

"Dammit, Higgins, we don't need simple explanations, we need complicated excuses!"

Take your time coming back...they're looking for scapegoats.

'We're looking for someone who's very responsible. In fact, we're looking for someone who's always responsible.'

Office Canteen: 'Getting in a consultant is win-win for us... we'll get the credit if it's a success - but, if it all goes wrong, we've got someone else to blame!'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

'It's so much better since business became computerized -- it was so hard to blame things on typewriters.'

'Hey, that's a bad roll. Let's try that again.'

"It's an even numbered day. Do we blame the message or the messenger on even numbered days?"

'I like the way you handle responsibility, Mac, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

Management by committee: 'The buck stops here, here, here, here,,,'

"I'm not worried because somehow all this is your fault."

Scapegoat: In case of emergency

"I will be reading a prepared statement, but I don't know who prepared it, so don't blame me!"

"Ya, that's right. Blame the help."

'You worry too much. Next time something goes wrong, try blaming someone else.'

'Ms Simpson? Get me the Scapegoat du Jour.'

"I'm all out of answers! Get me my book of excuses!"

"Delegating authority is useful. Delegating blame is essential."

'The object is to get the ball into either of those two nets.' - 'It would help if the men didn't get in each other's way so much.'

I blame society for putting me here. But mostly I blame metallurgy for keeping me here.