Black Hole Ponderer T-Shirts

'Say again: a train going 50 Miles Per Hour leaves Chicago heading to a black hole where the rules of motion change as a function of distance from a singularity ... and then what?'

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

'But what is the universe for?'

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

God Sneezes Out Creation

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

Schrodinger's Black Box

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

The Origins of Everything

"What's your favorite planet, Randy?" "There is only one answer, little buddy. There is only one planet full of lush, green forests and beautiful, windswept ocean vista... all of which are natural aphrodisiacs that inspire lovers, philosophers and poets." "You know, Pandora is not a real planet." "I'm talking about Earth, you... Do you ever go outside?"

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

'At least I don't have his life.'

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

NASA, 'I thought I smelled oxygen!'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

Economic Downturns

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"I hate it when the palcebo does better than the drugs we're testing."

"Shall we put it in play?"

"If the universe is expanding, that's all the more reason to get back to the city."

Progress?

Astronaut stumbles upon a weird space anomaly.

"The central digital platform is temporarily renamed Project Schrödinger’s Cat. Until it is accessed on the 24th February it both is and is not a working system."

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

The Apple Picker Doesn't Fall Far From The Tree....

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

'Remember when the authorities were notified when we were spotted? Now nobody cares. They think we're drones.'

'Who was there to hear the Big Bang?'