Birdbath Critic T-Shirts

"Stop, you idiot! Can't you read?!"

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

"Last week, the orioles were passing out Baltimore catechisms. This week, it's the cardinals doing baptisms."

"We need to make some cuts. We’ll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'Nobody does curses like Gordon Ramsay.'

I dread to think what he would have got had they made a profit.

'You're a bad credit risk so, yes, of course you can have some money.'

I thought we agreed, this birdbath was our little secret!

'A bit extravagant don't you think you think?'

"I'd heard banks were reluctant to give businesses money - but I didn't think it was this bad..."

"We were already in this room—I remember that hideous Renoir."

Birdbath & Beyond

"Wait, sir. It's a new banking regulation -- You can't leave without depositing something."

Foreclosure.

'What the... they raised our property tax assessment 21 percent because we added a birdbath!'

'Well if they are 'laugh lines', you've got an awful lot for such a misery guts!'

'Usury' is not a pretty word, Mr. Williams.

"Oh, come on. Live a little. It's liberating."

'They're the only people getting any money from banks these days.'

EU bank restructure.

"This is our delux model."

'You have been pre-approved for another credit card.'

birdbath

The nurses here are so slow. Could this blanket be any thinner? The button the TV remote are too darn small.. Although her health had improved, Mabel's condition remained critical.

"He just bought the water rights."

"I love this time of year when the leaves hide the empty burger boxes, beer cans, chocolate wrappers..."

"A birdbath, eh? -- you some kinda voyeur?"

"When you're through with that, there's a water cooler on seven that needs emptying."

No more dadburn bailouts!

"Here - it's an invisible prescription for your imaginary pain."

"Are you kidding me?! It's a communal bath, I'm not getting in there! When do you think they last changed the water?!"

When did THAT go in?

"I get no kick from champagne."

No Diving.

"Men."