Bird Lover With A Financial Twist Pillows

'The action next week is going to be in bird seed, but if you quote me, I'll deny I said it.'

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

Vegetarian Birds

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"Pass that."

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"Great tights!"

Elon Musk Ditches Twitter Logo

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

Chickenspox

Jonathan Bugsy Seagull

'I know you like romantic things, so I built us this love-nest. Stuck together with my own spit.'

"Now, son, hitting a car is all about timing. You'll want to release about here..."

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

'Do you think anyone will notice my funny hat shaped like a fish?'

'You won't last ten minutes out there.'

"We've only got one parrot remember."

'I hear they're going to cable.'

Vegetarian restaurant: 'Two vegetarians please.'

'It's a good living. They train you to do default swaps and you get paid in seals.'

"Now will you knock it off with all the bird calls?"

A Carrot: 'Who's a pretty farmer then?'

'The Dow is going up, the Dow is going down, the Dow is...'

'Without running tests I'd say you're eating too much turkey.'

The Fifth Annual Crow Convention - "If you ask me, I reckon it looks like a murder!"

'She lithpth!'

"Who died?"

"We only have three and twenty black birds for the pie."

"Far out Nigel, I know you're a purist, but at some point, you'll need to switch to e-books like the rest of us..."

"Your cholesterol level is through the roof!! When you die, may I hang you up in my garden for the blue tits..?"