Bird Enthusiast With A Twist Pillows

Bird box with satellite dish.

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

'You know too much!'

Pigeon Little

How about going easy on the carbs

So you're a mocking bird...

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

Canada Goose Jackets

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"Just don’t tell the other vultures. I’ll never hear the end of it."

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

"Did you get my tweet?"

'I got tired of wet feet all the time.'

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

Cat tries to reach a birdfeeder on stilts.

Spring Training

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

Vegetarian Birds

"I'm all for pushing them out of the nest, but maybe next time we could wait till they hatch."