Bird Lover With A Financial Twist T-Shirts

'The action next week is going to be in bird seed, but if you quote me, I'll deny I said it.'

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

Vegetarian Birds

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

"Your stork analyst is here, sir."

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"Pass that."

Elon Musk Ditches Twitter Logo

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"Great tights!"

Chickenspox

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

Maybe it's time to stop giving our bones to a broker and start burying them in the backyard again.

Jonathan Bugsy Seagull

Signs reads 'Do Not Feed the Boids.'

'Do you think anyone will notice my funny hat shaped like a fish?'

'I know you like romantic things, so I built us this love-nest. Stuck together with my own spit.'

"Now, son, hitting a car is all about timing. You'll want to release about here..."

'Unfortunately, although I worked on the movie, I did not meet Mr Hitchcock in person...'

'You won't last ten minutes out there.'

Vegetarian restaurant: 'Two vegetarians please.'

Chef feeds birds from bench.

'I hear they're going to cable.'

"Now will you knock it off with all the bird calls?"

A Carrot: 'Who's a pretty farmer then?'

"We've only got one parrot remember."

'It's a good living. They train you to do default swaps and you get paid in seals.'

'The Dow is going up, the Dow is going down, the Dow is...'

'Without running tests I'd say you're eating too much turkey.'

"We only have three and twenty black birds for the pie."

'She lithpth!'

"Your cholesterol level is through the roof!! When you die, may I hang you up in my garden for the blue tits..?"

The Fifth Annual Crow Convention - "If you ask me, I reckon it looks like a murder!"

"Who died?"