Bird Detective T-Shirts

REPENT!: 'Seasonal bird migration is somehow different this year...!'

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

Wildlife

"You say it all the time, so I climbed every tree to prove it. You were right, money doesn't grow on trees."

Barks in code.

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"Look, a bug!"

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

"I'm not growling, it's my stomach rumbling!"

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'So who needs sonar?!'

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

Murder in Apartment 6-K

"Hello? Is that the canine help line?...."

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

"I don't think you can call two ants a 'bug safari'."

Sergeant Jones gave the assurance that they had an 'assortment' of leads back at the station. . .

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

'The word bath is mentioned.'

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

Man to pets about upside down house: 'I don't care who started it!'

'This duck call works too well.'

"You'll build another bug collection in no time."

"What's all this?"

"Now how did she know?"

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

"You're not a police dog, and that's not a crime scene."

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

"If you could live your life all over again, what dead animals would you roll in?"

"Aw, Dad! I don't wanna move. I just made friends with a fossil!"