Biomechanics Buff Gifts

I don't know -- Walking upright doesn't look very aerodynamic.

Muscles

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

A day at the transgenic races

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

Wonders of Evolution: This species has developed an unusual protective shell.

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

Great Moments in Computing #192: Newton discovers the computer.

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

Bio, Inc. Should we continue to invest in this promising new cloning technique? Yeah, let's double down on it.

'Once I got the cold fusion problem out of the way, the rest was easy!'

'It's caused by doing too many wrist curls, overindulging in spinach and... Excuse me. Everyone in here - stat - if you want to see an actual case of 'Popeye Syndrome'!'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

'They used to be called sheep, and they produced wool. Now they're some sort of bioengineered creatures, and they produce antibiotics.'

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

'If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it' actually a gene-modified flounder.'

"We supply the exercise and nutrition program, but it's up to you to supply the narcissism."

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

"In my workout this morning I hit a new personal best, but on a seasonally adjusted basis, my numbers actually fell."

''Relativity,' you say? — Well, it can't be any worse than your 'speed bump' theory.'

"I'd like to give you a break, but we did have you doing a hundred and eighty-six thousand miles a second on the radar."

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."

Fitness Course.

"... But here in the outside world, I need more time and I need more space."

'All I can say is my wife worked out every day when she was pregnant.'

'Since I got this exercise ball, my abs have gotten into the best shape they've ever been!'

"Don't be ridiculous. If the wheels were round, you'd never be able to stop."

"Steroids."

Newton discovers surrealism

Physics toy.

'Can't you spell? This is 'muscle beach.' You want 'M-U-S-S-E-L Beach.''

"Oh, we're not bouncers. We just can't fit through the door."