Bills Gifts

'Here, check it by processing my bill.'

'We forgot to pay the phone bill.'

"I forgot to pay the light bill. I swear, I would forget my head if it wasn't screwed on."

Cat puts off paying gas bill, to sleep longer...

'Money? But it says here you will pay my bills free of charge!'

"I just got a second notice on my credit card bill. But I never even got a first notice."

"Thank you for ringing your energy company. Please leave a message after the laughter..."

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

'It was more than my finest hour, Paltrow. It was my finest billable hour.'

I am billing, therefore I am.

"I charge by the grain."

'I wish you'd put the heater back on Frank! Even the wall ducks have gone somewhere warmer!'

Medical Billing & Coding

"Remember to round each billable hour off to the nearest week."

"No this is your contract. The other one's your bill

'The computer links me to other doctors, so I can see how much they're charging for tests.'

"The doctor recommends payment in advance. A person in your condition doesn't need to be worried about bills."

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

"It's a great invention, but what if it leads to UTILITY BILLS?"

'I know my electric bills are way over due, but could you at least wait until the Super Bowl is over before turning off my electricity?'

"Your 'businessman's lunch' was $9.95, sir, but I had to add a 'fair share' surcharge."

"My doctor told me to avoid any unecessary stress, so I didn't open his bill."

'I need you to open wide, Peel.' - 'Ahhh.' - 'Not your mouth, fool! Your wallet.' - 'Arghhh!' - 'Wider!' - 'Argh!'

Duel Fuel?

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

'Poor me. . . pour me a drink!'

"Warren serves as my aggregator."

"We lawyers are very conscientious about our charges and I remember that one specifically: I called to wish you a happy birthday and I got your answering machine so I just billed you a quarter of an hour."

"Your bill includes a 10% surcharge that goes towards raising awareness of the rampant overcharging in the legal fraternity."

"His ingrowing solicitor was playing up again."

'No, it wasn't a horror movie, It was the gas bill'

'Remember to bill for the time it takes to bill for the time it takes to bill.'

"Skip parts A through H and fill out the I, O and U ones!"

"Separate checks as always, Dr Jekyll."