Bill Payer Pillows

"Did you pay the gravity bill?"

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

Billy strip: paying bills with a smile.

Dual Fuel Bill in Hell

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

IRS Audits. That's your fourth "honest" mistake in a row!

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

'It was more than my finest hour, Paltrow. It was my finest billable hour.'

I am billing, therefore I am.

"We calculated your age by how many hours you billed your clients, and you are at least 96."

'Accounting has suggested we standardize our billing procedure.'

"I charge by the grain."

Medical Billing & Coding

'About this obscene material found in your desk.'

"The first bill is always a shock-everyone thinks Heaven will be free."

"Remember to round each billable hour off to the nearest week."

"No this is your contract. The other one's your bill

'The computer links me to other doctors, so I can see how much they're charging for tests.'

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure you're single-handedly keeping the U.S. postal service in business."

"That's guy's got 12 personalities...address his bill 'To Whom It May Concern.'"

"Recovery involves elements of faith. So let's pray my billing service, this hospital and your insurance provider all work smoothly together."

The 12 Days of Covidmas

"The doctor recommends payment in advance. A person in your condition doesn't need to be worried about bills."

'Hey! Roll a mile in my shoes!'

'Oh, yeah, they're cute until you can no longer claim them as dependents on your tax return.'

'Poor me. . . pour me a drink!'

"Your bill has been doubled to include your own false pregnancy."

About this dependant of yours...

"His ingrowing solicitor was playing up again."

Sorry, you can't claim depreciation on your wife.

'Even after death you must pay a tax - the sin tax, , ,'

'No, it wasn't a horror movie, It was the gas bill'

IRS, 'Oh, you needn't be unduly concerned, sir -- this year, we're auditing everybody with silly mustaches.'

Mystical Marty's only problem with paying the rent was keeping the quarters from sticking together.