Tax Payer Pillows

'About this obscene material found in your desk.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

"It's the new simplified tax demand from HMRC. . . Three Questions - How much did you earn last year? How much have you got left? And how soon can you send it. . .?"

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

I'm afraid neatness doesn't count, Mrs Wilson

Dance of the sugar plum tax attorneys.

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

"Taxation with representation hasn't worked out so well." (two men at the US capital talking taxes and politics)

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

Counting dollars

IRS Audit Section

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"I rob from the poor and give to the rich."

'I couldn't imagine bringing a child into the current fiscal-cliffy world.'

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

"Rapunzel,Rapunzel.Throw down your accounts for the last fiscal year!"

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'