Big_pharma_battler Gifts

"Can't afford our drug, eh? Too bad. Say - nice looking watch."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

The Buck Never Stops.

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

"Careful Hank, this one still has some fight in him."

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'Let me guess - you lost a fight against a young challenger who has now replaced you as the company's alpha male!'

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

Doctor surrounded by notes.

I'm going to switch you to a new medication that does more advertising.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed mini-mall site, but that I'm not as familiar with your galaxy's zoning laws as I'd like to be.'

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

ANd the Oscar for the best special side effects goes to ASTRAZENECA!

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

Profits for Big Pharma

'Word has it that you have an ulcer, Tomkins. Nice going! You'll find an extra 20 bucks in your paycheck.'

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

"Well, the drug's no good, but the side effects are bitchin'."

Bureau of Red Tape

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

"I think she's having a Spontaneous Paperwork Induced Collapse."

"Ambitions... to finish on the winning side for a change."

"Someday my grant will come."

The mazes were too easy, so now they have me running through bureaucracies and looking for grants. (Originally published on 2007-10-18).

"In principle we're happy with the trust idea...as long as it's properly monitored and regulated!"

'When I die, please cremate me and send my ashes to the tax office. . .Write on the envelope, 'Now, you have everything.''

The discovery of the $2,000 Aspirin

'You have a good chance of recovery, if you can make it through hospital admissions.'

'...or you could fill out this Form 666 and get a filing extension for all eternity.'

Woman in hospital: Pick up a leaflet, Pick up a bug.

"More government regulations, Mr. Maslin?"

'I'm sorry, sir, but this particular loophole is only for the use of Federal employees.'