Big Laugh Seeker Pillows

7 Dead Twits Pub & Alehouse - 'He's paying.'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Bad fake tan day.

"That'll be five bucks."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

"What did Jesus order?"

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

"Projectile hairballing."

Drunk Barber

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

he used to belong to a cartoonist

"Hey! Get back here!"

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"I've always wanted to do this - 'knock, knock...who's there?'"

Football heads...

Bald Man Overcomb

Jerk Gene

"Baxter, I've decided to take you off crisis management."

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

Covid-19 Caution

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

'I don't understand. Why do you want to have your arms extended?'

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

When Stupid People Get an Idea