Big-box Adventurer Gifts

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Thirty Four

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

American Idle.

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

Travelogue

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

"Time passes much more slowly in the other dimension, so take these sudokus."

Astronaut

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

'Are you guys still watching the tapestry? Why don't you go outside it's such a nice day!'

'You folks enjoying the big top?'

If you think that's good, you should see the Pork Sabre!

Saguaro Cacti.

Skier.

Reading room

Information...

LOUIE'S GARAGE, 'I can go along with replacing the carburetor and the battery, but what's this $128.43 fcor a 'new warp nacelle'?'

'Why are you putting laundry soap into the proton anti-matter warp drive engine?'

'We're looking for a wifi hotspot.'

"Let me guess: Step two, add sand."

Sam Jackson

Area 51 Shaed of Gray - No Trespassing

'I went window shopping today. I came home with four double glazed units!'

Final clearance sale.

'Oh good, valet parking.'

If you're going to wear a GoPro, Larry, you have to actually go.

"Mom says you are going to play in the sand."

Zoo Employees

Nosferatu-D2

"What do you mean you're staying in with a good book?"