Beverage Taster Gifts

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"I'm getting red fruits, earth tones, and oak. Amen."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

Complementary Beverages

Wine taster with mineral water

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

'I'm doing a wine tasting course, it's fascinating. . .'

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

'I don't actually want to learn so much that I become a wine buff - just a wine snob!'

'I've found taking a sip of another table's wine is an effective conversation starter.'

'The bouquet is reminiscent of rubber nose - but then, it always is...'

"You can tatse the slopes, er I mean hops in this."

'Frank, it's water.'

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

IRS, 'Yes, but in order to deduct it, you have to be a LICENSED wine-taster.'

'Sorry, I only drink still wines. I don't have the patience to wait for bubbles to pop.'

'He's judging our reserve pinot noir - five years to produce it, five seconds in his mouth.'

"Would you prefer sparkling water, filtered water, tap water or water?"

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

"Honestly, it's not what you think. Mostly it's just a seemingly never-ending series of pointless tasks - but at the end of it you get to sit down in front of a TV with a beer."

'In order to be the king's permanent wine taster, you only have to be able to do 3 things: drink, swallow...and live.'