Betting Table Strategist Gifts

'There's not legalized gambling in our state, what are you talking about?'

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

'I don't like to take chances.'

Board Game Hunter

'What do you mean - you 'LET him win'?'

'In the 20 minutes it took for the pit boss to come back with a comp for the $10 buffet, I lost another $500.'

'What's the point of a bookmakers if there's nowhere left that sells books?'

'Twenty percent bluechips, ten percent small-caps, five percent currency hedges and the remainder in cash. Get that list to Santa right away.'

'It's ok Billy . . .I won a bet with principal Jones!'

Site of new Super Gamblers Anonymous.

Armstrong, the new Ybox game console comes out next week. I've got to get in line at Computer Villa. Nope. You are callous and inhumane. Fortunately, I have a backup plan. Computer Villa sale! If anyone cuts, chew their nose off.

Horse five to win, unless they change the jockey.

"Now that everyone's in...how do we get the food?"

Post Game Day Betting.

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

"Betcha can't hit the same spot twice in a row."

Scrabble with the Hares and Tortoise

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

'Do you think he'll win the second race?'

Spot the Ball connoisseur

'The blooming thing took a wrong turn off the course.'

'You should take one -- you could only improve your hand.'

'Hey, we're doing an office pool on who gets to bust that illegal card game on Main.'

'Will you make the final table?'

'I'm all in.'

"Watch out for the linebacker over the middle and the guy in section 7 whose point spread you ruined."

Monopoly game - "You just gazumped me!"

'So this is how they're recovering from insolvency?'

'Choked on his own vomit. I wonder how many points you get for that.'

A bet over spelling

Planning for retirement in a casino.

I just need exactly 30 minutes to go to a funeral. Exactly? That's how long it'll take me to march to the archipelago where Bajor was and light a dragon on fire in Bajor's honor. I hope you're going to tell me you're talking about some video game

'You had to go for a walk--now we've lost our table.'

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'