Believer In Unlikely Teachers Pillows

'Don't be a fool, Kevin! How do you know that he's a certified teaching pro?'

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"She said that girls mature faster than boys, so I pulled her hair."

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

'For the next hour, hold all calls. I'll be practicing tumbling. I have to learn to roll with the punches.'

'Just say no to ch-e-e-s-ee!'

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

At the Penguin fishing school: 'Gunvald has set the bar kind of high, gang!'

Dog Anatomy from Memory.

Benjamin Franklin

'It actually stands for 'substitute' but it keeps the children in line.'

People of Courage

'Today's lesson - how to slam a door.'

"I'm Miss Jones, your History-As-I-See-It teacher."

"I give all new teachers the same advice. First you have to get the attention of the class. Can you quack like a duck or juggle two books in the air?"

Student about substitute teacher that is a sub sandwich: 'We got a good lookin' sub today.'

'Do you have to explain nutrition with a pie chart?'

Lack History Month

"The big boot Italy ain't gonna kick the small shoe Sicily no more, capiche?"

"Our curriculum focusses less on rote memorization and more on putzing around."

'Oh look, I a flying saw sir.'

'Sir, one question... When will we know if we've run-out of invisible ink?'

"How do we know this isn't a ponzi scheme?"

"Dad, tell me about the birds and the bees and safeguards."

My dog ate my flash drive, and that's where I stored my homework.

'This is great - what an idea! I can do a unit on gravity and the laws of motion for science class!'

'Shouldn't you be marking our homework ?'

'I won't be coming in again - my dad's set up a free school in his shed.'

"I had a very trying day. I tried annoying my teacher, I tried annoying the principal..."

School for the Blind and School for the Inattentive.

"And of course there's the conspiracy theorists who believe aliens are already here amongst us..."