Believer In The Mystical Gifts

'Hey, come on -- You've got to believe in yourself!'

"You'll do laundry, you'll drink water...oh, and what's this? In the near future you'll clip your fingernails."

"You are gullible and naive. You believe untrained charlatans. You squander your money."

'Madame Astra spiritualist' door 'Please ring, knocking only confuses'

'YOur wife says she's been watching you, and there are a lot of things you need to work on.'

'Any jobs out there in the, you know, nether regions?'

Madam Zelga

"Wait - your future isn't dark and empty. I forgot to plug this thing in."

"She would've been more credible if she hadn't kept saying, 'according to your Wikipedia page'."

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

"Just let her believe in fairies a little while longer."

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"You're solemates!"

'There is no past. No future. Only the present, which is changing every instant. Time is merely an illusion. Got it?'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"How can you expect anyone else to believe in you when you don't believe in yourself?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

"I can't really tell you the future but I'll tell you what's trending on Twitter."

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

"Did you have a cat?"

Roy, if you can hear me, the Mets are twenty games over .500 and they have a good shot at clinching the N. L. East."

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

A voodoo doctor.

Nikolay Rerih

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

I channeled John Dewey. He says if you want to be a good teacher, don't teach reading and writing. Teach students.

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

Some day my Prince will come...

"Excuse me, do you folks believe in ghosts?"