Beauty Trend Followers Pillows

'Seriously! Have you ever considered spray tan?'

'So you had the full Brazilian?'

"Will these hooves ever dry?"

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

"Like my new haircut?"

Manners And Customs Of Ye Englishe: A Pic-Nic

Inflating Boobs.

Giraffe Selfie

"Somehow, some way, we have to guide these people back to reality!"

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.

Bartlett's Unfamiliar Quotations

"Port outbound, starboard home."

Sales - "For the last time, stop saving us money." (Colour)

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

The Aging of Underwear

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

A cow with a Brazilian.

Lady imitating fashion

"He's our new trend-spotter?"

"I'm pleased to say our dishes all have too much kale."

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

"Today on the ask Sadie show, we'll be addressing one single topic: 'Wolverine.' Specifically, we'll be talking about how most of you freaks who were obsessed with it for months are no longer talking about it. You people today have the attention span of a chimpanzee!!! That's an average of about 20 seconds, for those of you who still remember what I just said."

"A Leading cosmetics company believes our drilling mud would ake an excellent skincare product."

Smart 3 Piece Suite.

"It isn't fair! Why aren't thin lips fashionable?"

"Mixed nuts are brain food, or so I read in 'Mixed Nut Digest'."

"If they fit, we can return them."

"We couldn't find a raw-vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, non-G.M.O. cake for your birthday, so we got you nothing."

Man sees where he's at and he's 'Where It's Not At'

"I don't regret going bald. I just regret growing bald before I had a chance to rock a man bun."

Just a sec – I want to see which wishes get the most likes before I decide.

New Shades 2020

'Aaar! Walk the person planked on the plank!'

"What I'm looking for is a ten minute total makeover that doesn't change the essential me!"