Beauty In Aging Pillows

"Harold, are my knees bumpy?"

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

The adoration of the gels.

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

Bad fake tan day.

Spa

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

Bad hair day!

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

Dragon Hair-dryer.

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

Lesser known greek gods,

Shampoo.

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

"Round and round the cauldron we go, in the exfoliating toner I throw."

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

"Too much concealer?"

Pampered and poodled.

Cover Design for the Yellow Book, Vol 3- Street Lamps Lighting a Lady's Toilet Mirror

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

Dating is so expensive...

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'Have you no common scents?!'

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'