Beauty Believer Pillows

'It makes you look fifty years younger.'

'My mother thinks I'm beautiful. I'd like a second opinion.'

"I made a video of your water baptism..."

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Bad hair day!

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Dating is so expensive...

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

Pampered and poodled.

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

Could you see anything in her? I certainly couldn't! (Man's eyes are popping out of his head).

"I don't like your application."

"Might I suggest something wicked for dessert?"

What price beauty?

'Maybe I should get a shopping cart.'

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

"Don't worry about your hair, dear, I can fix it in post-production."

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

"Hair spray"

New Twenty Blades

Your presentation will be terrific. I was up all night, but something's still missing. Here. I've got just what you need. How thoughtful! Eye concealer! No need to thank me.

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"Botox."

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

Mirror mirror...

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."