Beachcomber Humourist Gifts

"What can you expect with a gag as old as this?"

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

"Too crowded. Let's go."

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

It beached on a pile of plastic bottles, so they were able to just roll it back out.

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'I don't care if it's hot, I won't go in the water!'

Daughters on the beach

These species are only living off the coast of Southern California!

Young Picasso at the Beach

Man listening to seashell: 'Oh, Rub-ber Ducky, you're the one ...'

Hey, it's true, you really can hear the sea in these shells!

Crab with a clown face.

"If you hold a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean..."

'It's true what they say, you really can hear the sea in these things!'

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

I took a vacation to forget everything and I forgot my luggage.

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

'There is no point in leaving civilization, because civilization will not leave you.'

'the selling of seashells by the seashore was sluggish.'

'See you in two weeks!'

"It makes me want to pee."

A crab with a utility knife claw

"Well Earned Vacation"

Squirrel on the beach