Beach Trip Planning Gifts

"My feet are cold."

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

"First class, or with children?"

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

Bring your own inflatable.

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

Beach Barbecue

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

'Hey - I love your new Bermuda triangle shorts.'

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

Try me/try me/try me...

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

''What's in the bag, lady?''

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

Shellfie

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

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