Battler Of Hidden Fees Gifts

"We'll take $10 off the monthly charge, but we reserve the right to slip it back in when you're not looking."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

The Buck Never Stops.

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

'I hate playing in an inflatable dome during a power outage.'

Bureaucracy gone mad!

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'Let me guess - you lost a fight against a young challenger who has now replaced you as the company's alpha male!'

Doctor surrounded by notes.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed mini-mall site, but that I'm not as familiar with your galaxy's zoning laws as I'd like to be.'

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

GPs could be forced to switch IT systems onto new NHS digital contract

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

"You want to withdraw your money? There's a fee for that."

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

Student Debt

"I think she's having a Spontaneous Paperwork Induced Collapse."

"Ambitions... to finish on the winning side for a change."

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

The mazes were too easy, so now they have me running through bureaucracies and looking for grants. (Originally published on 2007-10-18).

"Someday my grant will come."

Bureau of Red Tape

"In principle we're happy with the trust idea...as long as it's properly monitored and regulated!"

'When I die, please cremate me and send my ashes to the tax office. . .Write on the envelope, 'Now, you have everything.''

'You have a good chance of recovery, if you can make it through hospital admissions.'

"There's a $2.00 service fee for that friendly greeting."

'...or you could fill out this Form 666 and get a filing extension for all eternity.'

'I'm sorry, sir, but this particular loophole is only for the use of Federal employees.'

"More government regulations, Mr. Maslin?"

Todays Special: Beans on Toast #2.50 (use of tin-opener 10- extra. . .)

"The doctor's nurse's nurse practitioner will see you now."

Skills and experience held back by bureaucracy and protocols.

"I'm applying for a grant to be able to apply for more grants."