Battery Life Ponderer Gifts

"Our electric car is good for Frank. It's replaced his road rage with range anxiety."

'A short economics test - if you bought something for

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'Euro's down against the pound, dollars up against yen, pound is... what the hell don't expect cheap meals in France!'

'Would you like your dividend in pennies, nickels or bitcoin?'

"... and come out fighting, boys."

'We could use more moving and shaking from you, Yomp, and less bobbing and weaving.'

"I think the idea behind coin collecting is to get one of each kind, not all of the same kind!"

"Yes sir, I'm late. But I thought we were supposed to stop and smell the roses..."

A man about to plug in a lamp looks at electric sockets on the wall that say 'Solar,' 'Hydro Electric' and 'Nuclear.'

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"I want my job back."

'If we didn't live so long we wouldn't eat so much!'

Energy speculation.

30th Birthday - Doctors aren't like policemen.. they don't grow younger, they just age faster.

"Shouldn't we hold off an artificial intelligence until we figure out actual intelligence?"

"My biggest fear is being judged fairly by history."

'I'm part of the losing things generation.'

"Yes, even with all the progress they're making in geriatrics, marriage is still 'til death do you part."

The Mayfly, who lives from 5 minutes to just a few hours, are touchy about age.

"What's tough is having to build a new power base from scratch."

'Not AGAIN!'

"You know damn well that E-on wrote to us months ago, and what did you do? Precisely nothing!"

"Did I just give, or did I give wisely? That is the question."

"I always just check the box without reading that stuff."

'Methuselah is very depressed. The doctor gave him only 85 more years to live.'

'How come gas prices go up more in summer,when people drive more?'

The virtual vanity mirror.

The Master Switch

". . . I remember hair. . ."

It's Lonely at the Top

'I give you five years but your insurance company gives you one.'

"Could someone please explain to me why I'm celebrating the fact that I'm a year older?"

When Bert stopped wondering why, statistically, women outlive men...