Battery Life Ponderer Gifts

"Our electric car is good for Frank. It's replaced his road rage with range anxiety."

'A short economics test - if you bought something for

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'Euro's down against the pound, dollars up against yen, pound is... what the hell don't expect cheap meals in France!'

'Would you like your dividend in pennies, nickels or bitcoin?'

"... and come out fighting, boys."

'We could use more moving and shaking from you, Yomp, and less bobbing and weaving.'

"Yes sir, I'm late. But I thought we were supposed to stop and smell the roses..."

"I think the idea behind coin collecting is to get one of each kind, not all of the same kind!"

A man about to plug in a lamp looks at electric sockets on the wall that say 'Solar,' 'Hydro Electric' and 'Nuclear.'

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

'If we didn't live so long we wouldn't eat so much!'

Energy speculation.

30th Birthday - Doctors aren't like policemen.. they don't grow younger, they just age faster.

"I want my job back."

"Shouldn't we hold off an artificial intelligence until we figure out actual intelligence?"

"My biggest fear is being judged fairly by history."

'I'm part of the losing things generation.'

'Not AGAIN!'

The Mayfly, who lives from 5 minutes to just a few hours, are touchy about age.

"Yes, even with all the progress they're making in geriatrics, marriage is still 'til death do you part."

"What's tough is having to build a new power base from scratch."

I used to feel empty and worthless around that heavy guy, too, until I realized, hey, he's just full of pennies!

"You know damn well that E-on wrote to us months ago, and what did you do? Precisely nothing!"

"Did I just give, or did I give wisely? That is the question."

". . . I remember hair. . ."

'Methuselah is very depressed. The doctor gave him only 85 more years to live.'

"I always just check the box without reading that stuff."

'How come gas prices go up more in summer,when people drive more?'

The virtual vanity mirror.

The Master Switch

It's Lonely at the Top

'I give you five years but your insurance company gives you one.'

When Bert stopped wondering why, statistically, women outlive men...