Bathtub Buff Pillows

'Which end's the shallow end?'

Bagpipes in the bath.

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

' ... and this is the half bath.'

'Have you cleaned behind your ears?'

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

"I can hear the sea boiling."

"Just when they thought it was safe to go back in the water, the great fish emerged from below."

Strategies that will always work

"What did I say about leaving those things by the bath?"

'Honey, I think you overdid the plastic canvas decorations in the bathroom.'

How men shop for towels.

Contrary to popular belief... pigs are very clean animals!

'Why can't you be like other men and just sing in the bath?'

"My art dealer assured me people will think it's worth a lot mo is."re than it

'A bit extravagant don't you think you think?'

Lifeguard... Lifetime funds manager

Mozart swimming.

'It's a variation of the South Beach diet -- we bury you in the sand till you lose fifty pounds.'

'Mind giving him his bath now- he'll be asleep when we get home!'

"Trevor's nose is running."

"Young Master downright lied to Mistress! I can smell he didn't use soap or shampoo when he took his bath!"

'Is this the open house?'

Asian Travel: 'Absolutely do NOT book anyplace without a western toilet!'

"I'm having an en-suite put in."

"You have no idea what I've been through."

'Mom, you did say it is a bath robe.'

A bird is trapped inside a bubble and is floating away.

Ladies using thier cage crinolines as bathing machines

'There you are dear - I was just telling Mr. and Mrs. Mumby about our little game of trying to have a bath during the commercials.'

'Maybe we should dilute the cleanser some.'

Giraffe bath.