Basset Hound Fan Pillows

'...Basset Hound! Anal sacs!'

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

No littering...

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."

Dogs all across town saw fit to teach their owners a little empathy...

'That's right...he'll lick you to death.'

'Somebody's got to be kidding,'

"Shhh - he's trying open his third nostril."

'Now that's what I call a rescue dog.'

No Dogs.

Pets christmas tree

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"I'll throw around the 'old pigskin' as long as the pig isn't still in it."

'Try it! I think it's gone bad.'

Tiger suddenly realizes he enrolled in the wrong class.

World Championship Sheepdog Trials.

'You know Rosco, our species just ain't what it used to be.'

"Yes, but why did they use a picture that makes me look fat?!"

'Satchel...Why are you crying?'

'Meet my significant other.'

'I'm patriotic, but nobody beats Fido at wagging the flag!'

"I admire your dogged determination."

"Ha ha, I guess my photo on the dating site may have been a little misleading."

"You're not the first patient I've had who thinks he's a dog, Mr Buxton, so please, get up on the couch."

"I have to go out for a few hours, and don't give me any attitude about it."

'I said - MOVE IT!'

'Bad dog! Stop trying to kill the cat!'

"How's the new job?"

"There's more than one way to skin a cat!" - Book signing.