Bars And Lounges Pillows

This next request goes out to the big spender who would like to hear 25 cents' worth of "Louie Louie."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"An everything Martini, please."

Check your universal remote control at the door.

"Well, what are you doing after the millennium?"

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

Watching the football.

If bar stools were like playground swings...

'No more for me, thanks - I've already had a skinful.'

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

A chip off the old block...

'Sorry... We don't serve food here.'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

Towny Music Night.

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

"Drinking improves my vodkabulary."

Frog and Princess in Bar

Pints of Lager

Raw Piano Bar

'I promised my wife I was only getting one beer.'

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

"My body is a temple... unfortunately it's in ruins"

'Do you have any denture friendly sandwiches?'

"Sometimes I'd like to smack the stock market across the face and tell it to just chill."

Joe's Bar, Under New Joe!

"Well, at least I'm embracing my feminine side!"

'Anyone can eat right... but it takes a top performer to drink right.'

A Busy Sports Bar

Full glass

"Oh him, that's Ron. He's a permanent fixture in here."

Live soccer today.

'Damn early birds.'

"In actual fact, most pubs these days cater for kids." (Toddler served milk at bar).

Join me in a beer?

"Oi, who are you bleedin' looking at?"