Barrister Buff Gifts

Barrister pointing out dozing judge to the jury

'My client is willing to endure raised eyebrows from the general public for his behaviour.'

Trial by Media

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

'What's wrong now?'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'

"We need to do something about excessive admin. I want you to fill out one of these forms every time you think you're doing some."

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

I love Lawyers

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

Joe's 'Take Responsibility For Your Own Actions' Bar.

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

Barristers

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

Patent Attorney (invisible man)

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

"Before vaporizing this one, we need to file an environmental impact report."

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

"Bailiff."

Junior barrister prompting a deaf and testy chief

"Useless information"

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"