Barnyard Aficionado T-Shirts

'I know you've heard about how we roosters get around, but believe me, I'm a one-chicken guy.'

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Bubble Gum Farms.

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

A Cow Striptease

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

"What do you mean I eat as though I was born in a barn? I WAS born in a barn."

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

"Haay, Tia Carmen, these eggs sure are fresh! What's your secret?"

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'You can stop worrying about your husband Mrs.Dellrow...He's going to be fine,now that we have him in a stable condition.'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

Warning: Not giving milk is hazardous to your health.

"Hey, you two, get a barn!"

'This is my mom and dad.'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

When Cows Discovered Mowers

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

"I stink... therefore, I am."

"Don't leave me dangling!"

Three ducks: two have normal bills, third one has bill turned around like bill of cap.

'Tender and Juicy.'

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

'No. I insist. You first.'

Sheep

'I'd like to speak to the slop steward.'

"I just try to do my part- camembert, brie, Velveeta - Those are marketing decisions.''