Barker's Buddy Gifts

"No, I did not sniff you!"

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"I think she's figured out what W-A-L-K means."

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

"Is this any way to treat 'Man's best friend'?"

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

Dogs

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

'I found him on the internet.'

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"First they taught me how to pee on the newspaper. Then they taught me how to fetch it. I reversed the sequence by accident and I've been out here since."

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'They do say they're a shy breed.'

"Sometimes I bark at nothing."

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

Man's best friend - Man's worst friend - Man's only friend.

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

"Since when did your time spend being man's best friend become billable hours."

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

"Haay, Tia Carmen, these eggs sure are fresh! What's your secret?"

Headshot of perky dog.

'He's barking mad!'

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

'Can't one eat in peace!'

'Don't forget to talk about their dog!'

'The woman who crossed the street when she say Marmaduke. . . I think she was his groomer.'