Bar Trivia T-Shirts

'The difference between Micro and Macro economics is this: Macro is what you owe, and Micro is what you're paid.'

Before the Internet

"I just edited your Wikipedia entry." "Big whoop." "What a coincidence, that's what scientists have classified you as: Bigwhoop." "...The much grumpier, much louder, and much, much older second cousin of Bigfoot." "You lousy son of a..." "Wait... thank you. That's very flattering."

'Bartender...There's soap in my beer glass!' - Man farting bubbles.

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

Complementary Beverages

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"If I had been on 'The Brady Bunch', which I wasn't, I'd have been Greg, whom I ain't"

A mini Kebab take-away and a minibar

You have had enough

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

'He thought the fire alarm was the bell for last orders, and ran towards the bar.'

Ostrich Bar

". . . so a duck walks into a . . ."

"Time! Ladies and gentlemen please, for yet another probe into the brewing industry"

"With other dates I've been on, long walks on the beach seemed like a cliche, but with you it really feels genuine."

'I think she just whispered those three little words in his ear - Time,Gentlemen,Please!'

Inappropriate horse whispering.

"I'm taking a creative writing class. I turned in my checkbook and got an A."

Our changing neighborhood: new store openings.

"I giggle when I laugh." "I pee when I sneeze."

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

Bartender: 'Bad day, huh?' Man: 'I'll say. My vindictive ex-wife just won sole custody of my inner child.'

"I'm not whining."

"Sooo....my wife and I saw you from across the bar."

"I feel like I've just been played my whole life."

'I'm an economist, but I try not to take myself too seriously.'

Joe's Bar: Revenge is a dish best served with cold beer!

'Say! You're new here aren't you?'

'Wow!... Look at the personality on her!'

'If that's my wife, you're not in!...'

'Propping up the bar again tonight, Sybil?'