Bar Scene Observer Gifts

Nobody likes a detached retina.

"Pint of lager and a rohypnol shandy please mate."

"The best things in life are free. The rest are married."

"Public display of rejection"

This cocktail menu had me sold on a pink squirrel right up until they got to the word "scurry."

"It's courtesy of the gentleman seated at the other end of the bar, ma'am."

'Well of course I'm not tired of living! What a frightfully silly thing to say!'

'You know Mary, under this frightful appearance, a poet's hart is beating... and his kidneys... and his liver... and his bladder...'

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

'... and do you bring your beautiful breasts here often?'

'Yes, I'd like to screw you - I'm a lawyer.'

'He's so unlucky that he gets into accidents that started happening to someone else.'

"Yes, but am I the biggest dick you've ever met?"

"I'm a man of few words, but many numbers."

The current Brooklyn bar scene...

'No ice.'

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

"Why so grim, handsome?"

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

"On second thoughts, I'll have it stirred, not shaken."

The Cavern Club - "One for the long and winding road Mr McCartney?"

The Rind of the Ancient Mariner.

"So, do you come here often?"

"But, if I don't peel off the entire label, the label wins."

'I promised my wife I was only getting one beer.'

'Another martini please.'

Frog and Princess in Bar

'Of all the fern bars in Encino, she's gotta walk into mine.'

'Do you know how to make something called 'Casketon the beach?''

"I can see that you're a cultured individual..."

Beer