Bar Hangouts Gifts

"Well, at least I'm embracing my feminine side!"

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

You got that beer that the monks make, didn't you?

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

Beer Stall

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

Dolphin friendly tuna

Check your universal remote control at the door.

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

Just the one...

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

"Well, what are you doing after the millennium?"

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

Watching the football.

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

"Of all the wet cement, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks in mine."

If bar stools were like playground swings...

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

'No more for me, thanks - I've already had a skinful.'

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

'He's at a very impressionable age.'

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

Next Round Indicator

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

'Avoid the Christmas rush, drink now.

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'