Bandage Expert Gifts

"I bit my tongue...but the bandages won't stick!"

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

'I'd like a second opinion, doctor.'

'We're out of water, Jack. Time to go back up the hill to fetch a pail.'

World Cup Fever

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

'No.... My cat doesn't like being given pills either...'

'She's one of our nurses hiding from the patient load.'

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

"No, I wasn't in a car accident. As a new parent, I'm still trying not to trip on all the toys on the floor."

'Admit it,you've been bothering the nurses again,haven't you?

Medical Supplies

'My finger's stopped bleeding. I must have run out of blood.'

'My mom got it on. She said you'd get it off.'

'I'm afraid the bed shortage is rather acute...'

"If you need anything just wink."

'Any reason why I can't keep him in that cast?'

First aid: A wizard has a bandage on his finger with turban on it.

'Talking to John always raises my self esteem. He's such a great listener!'

'Pillow too soft?'

"Are you in there, Mr Elkins?"

Minor Surgery

'We may as well make use of you.'

S&M Lovers, "Not tonight dear... I haven't got a headache."

'Anything else need tying up?'

"Eww! -- Is that the only color bandage you have?"

'You can see the Doctor now. Don't ask him anything too medical.'

"Harry... Looking good buddy!"

'Keep your eye on the screen, and if anything unexpected happens, push the button!'

It's from your private medical insurance.

Carbon Dating Agency

"There's no response. Are you sure he's in there?"

'Jeez, honey! I thought we agreed not to bring our work home with us.'

'I found it in the Karma Sutra - it's an old Indian bondage trick.'

'I found it in the Khama Sutra...it's an old indian bondage trick.'