Ballpark Buddy Pillows

'Look at the foul ball I caught at the baseball game last night.'

'Yo, Bob! I think a heckler just nailed me with something. What's on my back?'

'Super Dog'

'Rover isn't any good at catching frisbees. You've heard of stone hands?...he's got a stone mouth.'

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

Currently Boston

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'...You push the wrong button, and now, instead of our fans enjoying a fireworks display, we've got an international incident on our hands.'

'Sorry, I can't come: Young Master has joined the scouts and tied me up with a fancy knot I can't work out...'

"Do you know what girls want?"

"I think it’s time we started holding other kids’ hands."

And the crowd goes wild—except for Mary, because she wasn't paying attention.

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

A boy holding a balloon

TWIN-KILLING CHOREOGRAPHY

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

'Yo, Danny! The pitcher's complaining about the crowd noise. Turn it down!'

'Yes, Haffner appears to be tiring...'

"I don't think he can touch your in-the-dirt ball."

Boys in the cloakroom.

"I love you. We all love you. Now throw some strikes."

"Fascinating!"

Born to play ball.

"She's high maintenance. I love her."

"Had half of Fox-and-Friends gnawing my ass this morning."

The Icebreaker

'No worries, Timmy. We're star athletes. We'll get off with a slap on the wrist for the rest of our lives!'

Baseball Angels

After the incident with Coach McKracken the Arctic Football League banned drink dumping.

'Congratulations, Hightower. You now lead the league in untainted urine samples.'

'We'll take three of the big bags... oh boy! This stuff always tastes better at the ballpark!'

Sports Bar ???

'Wow...I've got to admit, Stanley...when you said you always got the best seats I thought you were just blowing smoke.'

'Two beef and pork by-products and a turkey dog, please!'