Ball Thrower Extraordinaire Gifts

"Let's try it again. This time with a tad less mania."

Fetching the Ball

"Drop the ball!"

'Dogs are such simple creatures... they can just focus on their ball for hours, completely oblivious to the world around them...' 'Whazzat?'

"A tired dog is a – well, a whole lot easier to live with!"

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

Alternative fielding positions

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

Canine conundrum.

'I try and humour him...it's the only exercise he gets!'

Man throwing stick for dog

Dog joins another to run after a ball.

Counsel for the prosecution makes its closing argument in mime court.

'I give the same advice to all new teachers. Pretend you know what you are doing.'

"One of these days you're going to throw that thing and I'm not going to bring it back."

"Yes, they've hired a professional dog-walker! Frankly, I would have preferred a dog-runner or at least a ball or stick thrower..."

Born to play ball.

The Little Top.

"Look! A rare flightless bird!"

Javelin

"I borrowed it from my neighbor, he's a big tennis guy."

"By making him retrieve the ball I'm teaching him the self-reliance he'll need every day at work."

'Dave dropped out. He had chest pains and trouble breathing. They think he may have competitive heart failure.'

'And...?'

"That should keep him off our backs for a while."

"John, how are you gonna Baptize me when you throw like a girl?"

"I see good things in your future."

"You realize they won't know the difference."

"New Yorkie...New Yorkie..."

Impressive resume.

The Adventures of Tom Friedman, Boy Reporter

"For a minimal fee, you can upgrade to, 'predict-plus' and go add-free!"

Santa wearing a flight neck pillow.