Balding Beauty Enthusiast Pillows

Balding man at the hairdresser's

Bad hair day!

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Dating is so expensive...

Pampered and poodled.

'Wow, talk about shedding!'

What price beauty?

"I don't like your application."

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

New Twenty Blades

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

"I look kind of nice today. . . How long have I been this ugly?"

"More concealer?"

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

Mirror mirror...

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

'Botox...'

"That conditioner you recommended didn't do a damn bit of good."

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

"When I said hair transplant I meant more than one."

A cow with a Brazilian.

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

'I'm getting ready as fast as I can, and for the last time, it's a vanity table, not a 'workstation'.'

'And you thought that you had all the talent.'

"I got Golden Ash Blond No. 334, just like you said."