Baking Zen Master T-Shirts

"To truly reap the meditative benefits of lockdown baking, you have to mindfully eat it all afterwards."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'So, what do you think of my first attempt at making homemade beer?'

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

Beer Stall

Zenemies.

Yoga.

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

"It's called geometry, Mum."

"An untested recipe. An uncalibrated oven. Substituted ingredients. And yet, the cake...the cake is...magnificent!"

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

Annoying neighbours - irritating wind chimes

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

"I've decided to make myself another cup of coffee!"

FAQs.

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

Guru.

Bottle Distillery

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

"Show off."

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

Patissier

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"Hoarder."

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'