Baking Escapist Gifts

"Lucky for us, mother has been stress baking lately."

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

"I haven't started playing the violin. I hide my vegetables in here!"

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

Rising Gas Prices

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

"I'm ready for summer vacation! A good book takes you where you've never been!"

'I made it chocolate so it wouldn't show the dirt.'

I've decided to run for office so I can spend more time away from my family.

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

SEMINAR CANCELLED: Feel free to doodle.

'And you didn't think there would be any customers for liver-flavored cupcakes.'

'I pretended to be religious to get a place at this convent.'

Try out this summer's hot novels in a beach setting

As I understand it, if the ancient Greeks had had television to watch and video games to play, we wouldn't be stuck with all this stupid geometry.

Surgery / Canteen - The perplexities of priorites.

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

"Not again!"

'Someone added chocolate chips to all my recipe files. Do you know anything about that?'

"And this brings to a conclusion, thank goodness, our broadcast day."

Teacher's Lounge

'Not Andy. He'd rather do anything than go on the family vacation.'

Message in a bottle.

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Mom? Any chance you could take the kids to your friend's lake cabin? Trying to get them out of your house? Roger. I want to put the vacate" back in vacation.

Yet another family that decided to drop everything and follow The Grateful Dead around for a while.

'Sounds way too complicated, let's phone for a take away.'

'I never wanted a dishwasher. I find the best place to get some peace from my teenagers is the kitchen when the sink is full of dirty dishes.'