Badge Of Honor Bearer Pillows

"I can assure you, it's a real degree... not an honorary one!"

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"It's from my first fight. So make the stitches big so I'll have a gnarly scar to show off."

'Does this get me a purple heart?'

"Turtling: When a child's backpack exceeds his weight"

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

Je Suis Charlie

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

Welcome to middle management. Here's your shield.

King Richard I

Continental marshal

Whaling boat with banner 'Save the krill'.

'How many merit badges do you have?'

"Hi, it's me, the best little goddamn dog in the world."

"...But guess what Kevin's mother is doing for a living?"

'I got this one for failing to earn a merit badge.'

'The trend toward less alcohol consumption at office parties is having a bad effect on my health. Wine cooler bottles are heavier than beer cans.'

Cubans are happy despite bad weather.

"He's bracing himself for disappointment."

"Uh, oh, I forgot this is evaluation day..."

Paris Olympics opening ceremony

"I have my standards even if they're only industry standards."

'That last hill was a bit steep!'

"You've literally watched one game."

'I'm being awarded a medal for valor for ordering the chef's surprise.'

"Sorry... we're a juice bar now."

Cuban identity

"Don't worry, the first 20 years in this department are the hardest."

No confused expressions - 'Hey you!'

'Oh, Doctor! Did he hurt you?'

Happy cop.

"I'll bet those campaign ribbons have a lot of stories."