Bad Guy Fan Pillows

'I'd like a pair that makes me look a right ba***rd.'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

Batman at the Maternity Ward

Bowled over again!

Transylvanian backpackers.

"You do realize I'm going to have to bill you for ten?"

Silence of the Chickens...

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

Currently Boston

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

Open House of Horrors

Frankenstein's Monster's PC.

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

Crime in bookshop

Zombie Problems

Monsters looking for a new bed to move under.

Maps to the homes of guys with friends who know some of the limo drivers of the personal trainers of the stars.

A man at a cocktail party wears a nametag that reads "Trouble".

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."

"There's a loose string on your sweater, dear, but I'm afraid to pull it."

Frankenstein's Reading Light

'Regular or decapitated?'

Oliver Twist - Oliver Introduced to Fagin

"Now make sure your heat is high enough to sear your putrid meat quickly."

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

Gypsy curses didn't seem so threatening after the Mummy went into the peg business.

'I'll be the back yard cutting firewood. Have you seen my protective goggles?. . .Well, luckily I kept my old hockey mask!'

"Oh come on! How can you possibly know that it's Yorick without a proper forensic reconstruction?"

'This article says there was a break-in at the museum last night. I don't suppose you know anything about that.'

A spy