Bacon Appreciation Gifts

The smokiness of this overpowers my palate --- I'd like some bacon with more subtle flavors. A swine snob.

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

Hamlet

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

The pig that had a glimpse of the afterlife.

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

Fountain of Youth/Fountain of Bacon

Aromatherapy for Men

"We're trying a new incentive program. Bacon?"

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"Wow! - An original Bacon!!"

"Oooh... bacon!"

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

'Mom, where does bacon come from?'

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

"We did it! Barbeque, bacon, cheese and just a twist of kale!"

The BLTR (the bacon, lettuce, tomato, revolution)

"Here there is all the bacon, pizza and beer you could desire. But do not eat from the Tree of Tofu lest you should lose paradise."

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

"You're really gonna like these biscuits, there's bacon in them."

"If medical science wants to be really relevant, it would find a way to let me eat all the bacon I want!"

'Okay! Okay! I'll talk! I'll talk! Please, just don't eat any more bacon!'

"Remember me, Mister 'too much bacon is never enough?'"

What's a Texas Tommy? A hot dog stuffed with cheese and wrapped in bacon. Little Pete's Sounds great. Does it come with anything? A coronary.

"So this bacon in my ear - d'you think it can be cured..?"

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

"He was 95. The doctors reckon it was either the bacon, the beer, the whiskey, the smoking, the wine, the steaks, the coffee, the butter, the biscuits or just too much sunshine that finally did him in."

"It appears your high sodium bacon is playing havoc with your blood pressure."

"Next time you want me to swallow a camera, just wrap it in bacon!"

"Do not eat from the Vine of Bacon, for thought it is delicious, it will clog your arteries."

"You too, Merlot?"