Bacon Gifts

Aromatherapy for Men

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Remember me, Mister 'too much bacon is never enough?'"

"Well, the crazy bastards went ahead and did it... they wrapped it in bacon."

'Wake up and smell the coffee...it's that brown stuff right next to the bacon.'

Pets: Bring home the bacon.

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

"I thought there would be bacon here."

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

Hamlet

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

The pig that had a glimpse of the afterlife.

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

Fountain of Youth/Fountain of Bacon

"We're trying a new incentive program. Bacon?"

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

"Oooh... bacon!"

'Bacon-butties are my favourite!'

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

"Wow! - An original Bacon!!"

'Mom, where does bacon come from?'

"We did it! Barbeque, bacon, cheese and just a twist of kale!"

The BLTR (the bacon, lettuce, tomato, revolution)

"You're really gonna like these biscuits, there's bacon in them."

"Here there is all the bacon, pizza and beer you could desire. But do not eat from the Tree of Tofu lest you should lose paradise."

"If medical science wants to be really relevant, it would find a way to let me eat all the bacon I want!"

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

'Okay! Okay! I'll talk! I'll talk! Please, just don't eat any more bacon!'

"It appears your high sodium bacon is playing havoc with your blood pressure."

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

"So this bacon in my ear - d'you think it can be cured..?"

"Next time you want me to swallow a camera, just wrap it in bacon!"

"I don't know why I'm surprised, but you seem very down to earth."

Friared eggs and bacon for breakfast I see!