Backup Plan Enthusiast Gifts

"If the new business strategy doesn't work we still have plan B."

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

'I'm sorry. It looks like your insurance company doesn't cover pre-existing life.'

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

"They say that 'laughter is the best medicine', which is great because your health plan doesn't cover the real stuff!"

"Be afraid my friends...if the government takes over your healthcare, you're going to be left with nothing!"

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

"Hey, little fella. Welcome to the risk pool."

'You mean that if one of us came to a sticky end I would receive a hundred thousand?'

'I'm sorry Bill, but some things in medicine we doctors just can't explain...like insurance forms.'

HOLY LAND INSURANCE CO. , 'Darn you, Methuselah! -- You've completely

"I'm not here to take away your guns—I'm here to sell you some overpriced insurance."

Reducing Health care costs with health and fitness programs

"No, I didn't say, 'health'. I said I'm concerned about your wealth... Can you afford to pay my bill?"

'I'm not convinced you need tranquillizers to switch phone provider.'

Here's my dental insurance card. Sorry. Twig had a visit within the last 6 months. This one's not covered. That was a check-up. This is an emergency. How about Twig's chipped tooth? Your policy doesn't cover cosmetic problems. Now I get it! My insurance is cosmetic. Have a nice day!

Emergency Underpants

We can't call an ambulance. He doesn't allow personal calls on company time.

'Your coverages suggest it will spread rapidly to your wallet.'

Car insurance, breakdown cover, mobile insurance, home insurance, camera insurance... - 'Life insurance, health insurance, professional indemnity, and tax insurance.' - 'Let the bad times roll... heh, heh!'

"With this policy, at the age of 12, he receives 10 marrow bones a month."

'What do I do now? -- the company I buy my malpractice insurance from is being sued for malpractice!'

The missiles had failed....so it was down to Frank....and plan B.

'Lucky for you there was a safety net.'

'Any backup plan in case your dream of becoming a YouTube sensation doesn't pan out?'

'We're moving you from intensive care to intensive billing.'

"Richard, Mr. Chenolock, the insurance man, is here to determine your life expectancy."

"You'll be happy to hear I'm not holding you accountable for any of your preexisting conditions."

'After reading the more than 2000 confusing pages of a health care reform bill, he immediately went into post traumatic stress!'

Customer tangled up in velvet rope is trying to ring bell for help.

"Hang on, I've just thought of a plan B."